I was thinking the other day about all the excuses that we make to ourselves about why we can’t lose weight or why there’s no time to do exercise today, or whatever. Then I started thinking about the excuses that others make for us. So I thought I would write about that for my guest post here. I’m wondering if others find the same things happen to them.
I’m a lifelong wheelchair user as I have Cerebral Palsy (CP). But I’m not someone whose been overweight all their life. In fact when I was little my mum used to worry about my eating because I was such a fussy eater (and in some ways still am). I gained weight when I left home and suddenly I was the one who chose what was on the table and didn’t always make good choices. And I lost some of it slowly. Then I got hit by a bad bout of depression which I’m still clawing my way out of several years later. It all went to pot and I ended up at the highest weight I’ve ever been.
One of the things I try to do now is to be honest with myself. It’s not the easiest thing to do all the time and sometimes I slip up. As a part of that I refuse to justify things to myself. If I eat a bit worse than usual then I do and I just treat that as a part of my journey. If it’s because I’ve been to a special occasion like a meal out then fine. But it doesn’t become an excuse to eat whatever I like for days on end and slip back into old habits. I’m trying very hard not to use food as a comfort and a reward anymore. Which means I’ve stopped coming up with excuses about why it’s ok.
I am managing to lose weight now and I have some wonderful support. From friends and family and from people I’ve met online through the Healthy You Challenge and other places. Then there are those who make excuses in their being supportive.
A good friend of mine once told me “You’re in a wheelchair Emma, no one expects you to be thin.”
I realise that was meant to be helpful and supportive. What she missed however was for me it’s not about being “thin” but about being healthier and finding things easier. Doing this is what I expect of myself for myself.
And several people have made comments along the lines of “it’s not easy for you to lose weight” [because I have CP]. Again that was meant to be an encouraging and helpful comment. I do appreciate the support – and usually it’s not the whole of the conversation.
Weight loss isn’t easy full stop. Maybe because of being on a low income, or busy at work. Or people might not be able to get to the gym. There are millions of reasons and excuses why now isn’t a good time for weight loss and healthy eating. I’ve stopped making those excuses. Now I just need others to stop making them for me.
2 comments:
I have to say, I can totally relate to your sentence about leaving home and being responsible for what went on the dinner table. My family made sure I got all of the healthy foods I needed - that responsibility fell to me when I moved out and I've still not mastered it!
But go you - sounds like you've got some awesome determination and motivation! :)
I completely understand where you are coming from. It is so much easier to make excuses for ourselves when others start it. I think it would be so much more helpful if people would recognize our "positives" (like determination, motivation, and drive) instead of making excuses to make us feel better. Encourage us to do better and we will! I love the post and I am so glad you wrote it. It really makes me think! Thank you!
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