Insanity is..

...doing the same thing and expecting different results.    I tried to find out who is credited with that quote, and I got everyone from Benjamin Franklin to Albert Einstein.  
Regardless, it is so true!   How can you get different results when you try the same things on a day to day basis/ You simply can not!  

• I can't expect to feel well rested when I continue to go to bed late at night.
• I can't expect to lose those last pesky pounds when I haven't made any changes in "diet"/exercise.
• I can't expect to get out of this rut that I'm in by having the same routine every day.

So what the hell am I going to do about it?!

• I re-joined Weight Watchers.  There are things I love about the program, and there are things that don't work well for me.  What I need out of it is the accountability, the weekly weigh ins, the meetings and the tracking.  So, the majority of it will help me right now.  And realistically I am only 10-12 lbs from what I can establish as a lifetime goal... with that, moving forward...
• I am setting goals and giving myself rewards.   155 is my lifetime goal.   Once I am at that for 6 weeks, WW will be free for me.   As a reward for hitting lifetime (and staying there 6 weeks), I will re-join a monthly massage place as my reward (The cost for that is $10 more than what I pay for WW, so it's only spending $10 more for a massage, not bad!)    I will start saving and if I stay lifetime for 2 years, then maybe I'll treat myself to a boob job! WAHOO! LOL
• I will make sure I get 2-3 workouts in per week.   I will NOT use my activity points in Weight Watchers, but I will track them. 

Yesterday when I weighed on my scale, I was 169.8 (FREAKIN SCARY!)... Today when I weighed, I was 165.6. (Still out of happy zone). My all time low was 153, albeit I was only there when I was sick and unable to eat because of my ulcer.    My comfortable weight zone is 155-160 and 165 had been my PANIC mode weight... so, I'm in panic mode!    My official first weigh in will be tomorrow morning.. Wahoo!

Another thing - I refuse to diet.   I am not going to allow myself to get back into that pattern in my life.  I have spent basically the last 34 years of my life on a diet, and I am not going to start that vicious cycle all over again.  I am going to eat more consciously.   My job is stressful to me, and I eat when stressed.   I need to eat only when hungry, and not let my emotions dictate what goes in my mouth.  

Anyway - That's what's been happening in my little corner of the world... I will continue to update.